Nope, not a political post. If you were hoping for one – sorry. I’m going to stick with a subject that pretty much EVERYONE can agree on: Technology that is supposed to make our lives easier is actually making it more frustrating.

Pick some tech. Any tech. Whether it’s your phone, your computer, your tablet, your streaming services, your Sl’amazon account, your 5,328 unique passwords that you have to remember, your multi-factor authentication, your facebook page, your company website, your home security system, Annoying Telephone & Telegraph’s abandonment of support for copper cable, your touchscreen on just about anything, your car, your boat’s GPS, your company’s sales tax payments (online only), your regulatory compliance in __________, Alexa, Siri, and even your blasted washing machine…sooner or later, the tech part will give you trouble.

Don’t get me wrong. I love my Instagram as much as the next addict. (Actually, I don’t HAVE an Instagram account. My dog does. She keeps me updated on such things; I just hope she never forgets her password because I have NO IDEA what it is. Probably something like kibble or Iluvsquirrels.) But good GRIEF, as things get more convoluted it gets harder and harder to find Customer Service – especially someone you can actually talk to on the phone. (Unidentifiable accent) Hello thankyouforcalling Annoying Telephone and Telecom mynameis Elvis, howmayIhelllllpyou? (Disclaimer: I’m not putting down anyone who’s trying to earn a living like this. They surely speak English better than I could speak whatever their native language is. On the other hand, I KNOW BETTER than to try and get a job in customer support where I’d have to speak French. Or anything else.)

On rare occasion, I hear a voice that sounds…well, kinda like me. Or a LOT like me (that’s when I call the ‘lectric company, they’re in central Louisiana and while they don’t sound like me, they sound like my cousins in that part of the state and that’s close enough!) But – and that’s part of the frustration – the days when you can get ANY help by phone (regardless of where in the world it’s been outsourced to) are vanishing. At best, you get an automated menu with limited options – and of course, your problem is never one of the options offered (at which point the computer voice says “good-bye!” and disconnects.) And increasingly, Customer Service (or as I prefer to call it, Customer NONservice) is being outsourced to ChatBot.

I’m sorry, but Artificial Intelligence is not that intelligent. I know I’m not alone in saying that my frustration level rises the more I hear “tell me in a few words what you need help with so I can get you to a person who can help!” By the time I’ve spent 5 minutes going through menus for AI to figure out the correct department, I’m pretty frustrated. I get even more frustrated when I get a voice mail saying that the lone human who can help me is “currently away from my desk or helping another customer.”

No. No, you’re not. I’ll bet your on break scrolling through Instagram. Maybe even looking at pictures of my dog, the shameless hussy.

Don’t even get me started on the fact that I now have to set up an account to even look at what a company offers or ask a sales-related question! (yeah, I’m lookin’ at you, Lenovo, and you too, Wix) Even purchasing a movie ticket, subway fare, etc. requires something a little more than cash.

We used to complain about “press 1 for English.” Now it’s “Click here for chat assistance” or – in the case of a certain web services (I’m lookin’ at you, GoD*ddy) provider – “text us for help!” Chat and text “customer service” result in one poor overloaded customer service rep (probably on the other side of the world, being paid beans for each “individual” s/he helps) trying to serve multiple people at once. I’ve wasted many HOURS waiting for answers – at least five hours wasted on a single task, just in this week.

I’m not even counting the looooong minutes spent listening (when I actually talk to someone) reading the script. You know it, it’s the one that goes like this: “I am so sorry, Mrs. (they butcher my last name) that you are having trouble with this and i completely understand your frustration, I promise that I will get this taken care of for you, will you allow me to place you on a brief 3 to 5 minute hold so that I may investigate this issue further with my resources?”

Honestly, I have a problem with dealing with companies that force their employees to lie. 3 – 5 minute hold? HA!! And promise it will be taken care of? Another lie! Grumble about minimum wage all you like, there are companies out there that are compromising the immortal souls of their employees by forcing them to lie like this.

Tech frustration. It’s everywhere. More and more companies jump onto AI as a way to “cut costs” and don’t realize that so many of us are getting overloaded and just plain FED UP with it. What should be saving us time is costing us more time – not to mention frustration. To quote one of the great philosophers of our time, ain’t nobody got TIME fo’ dat!